Kuma’s Corner

Posted by Edmund in Chicago, Featured Articles, Gastropub, Restaurants | 0 comments

Cuisine: Burger Bar/Gastropub.
Specialty: Kuma Burger.
Location: 2900 West Belmont Avenue, Chicago, IL 60618-5804.
Price: $10-$13 for a burger.

I was making my rounds through Chicago’s burger scene, and at some point I got sick of it. In the last couple days, I’d eaten at least five burgers, and most of them had been at spotless, bland, sit-down restaurants. While I appreciate good service and comfortable seating as much as the next guy, at heart I just don’t enjoy the idea of housing a great burger in a fancy restaurant. A burger is simple food for the common man, and it’s meant to be sloppy. It’s always just that much better when you can eat it in somewhat of a dive or in a gastropub.

And that’s exactly why I turned to Kuma’s Corner. In a city of gourmet experiences, Kuma’s stands out for its down-to-earth, even grungy feel—a place you can go just to be comfortable and grab a drink with the guys while at the same time enjoying a monstrous behemoth of a burger. As soon as I heard about it, I knew I had to check it out, all the more so because not one, but two of its burgers had been proclaimed one of the best burgers in America, according to different sources I had read.

I finally got my chance to experience it for myself on a Saturday afternoon. Having just eaten at nearby Hot Doug’s, I made the trek to Kuma’s, only to pass through a rather plain, boring neighborhood. I wondered why such a popular restaurant was located so far away from the center of the city and questioned whether it was as good or as interesting as I had heard.

As Kuma’s Corner pulled into sight, though, I began to understand, as I saw a line literally flowing out the door. It was 3:00 p.m., and yet every single table inside was taken, and the wait was at least a good 30 minutes. This dead neighborhood didn’t seem quite so dead anymore.

And for what? What I would term a “classy dive”—that is, a dive that’s a dive by choice but that has the quality of food to really oust some of the better eateries in town. Like some of the grungier eateries in Chicago, Kuma’s is covered with fake grime and simply exudes a sense of attitude with its disgusting posters, the loud, throbbing metal blasting through the speakers, and especially the graffiti and photos of tattoos that cover the bathroom walls.

Do expect, moreover, to get dive bar-type service, with young, tattooed waiters and waitresses constantly rushing around to quickly pour drinks and deliver food and then moving on to the other thousand people waiting. You should thus be ready to wait an hour for those water refills.

Yet, while Kuma’s has that grunge look, it’s mostly an act, and I mean that as a complement. When you actually look at the bar and the tables, they’re pretty clean and comfortable, and despite the throng of people always gathered around the entrance, there’s quite a bit of space between the tables so that you never feel too cramped once you actually sit down. Moreover, Kuma’s unfortunately has some of the same gaudy, touristy tackiness that I’ve seen throughout the city, as it sells a whole line of paraphernalia, including a number of $20 T-shirts that it gratuitously posts all across the front of the restaurant. In that sense, it somewhat contradicts its own rough and tough image.

Still, Kuma’s underlying quality is undeniable, as even a quick glance at the menu will show. You don’t get dive-quality, boring, plain burgers with some Budweiser. Instead, you get a whole list of gourmet burgers and beers, making Kuma’s more akin to a gastropub merely acting like a dive bar. Sure, the burgers come with a side of attitude, bearing such names as the Slayer (which ironically lists Anger as a prime ingredient) or Plague Bringer, but they are actually a bit more high-brow than Kuma’s would seem to suggest, topped with everything from fried eggs and chorizo to Siracha hot sauce and cayenne avocado cream.

That shouldn’t be surprising, because as I said, Kuma’s has been repeatedly acclaimed as the best burger in Chicago and even Illinois. What stands out is especially how they make the meat. First, they put it in huge chunks onto a charcoal grill and give it what looks like a speedy high temperature char. About halfway through they put a small weight on the meat to compress it and release some of its oil. They stack on the cheese near the end, after which they take the patty, cheese and all, and put it in a smaller oven at a lower temperature to let the meat cook a little bit more and to melt the cheese slowly. It looks like the first grill helps to give the top that nice char, while the second cooks the inside to the right level. Unfortunately, I’m not sure if the technique works all that well, as the first burger I got was supposedly cooked medium but still had a lot of rareness and some mushiness on the inside.

Moreover, I wasn’t too impressed with the burgers in general. I ordered probably one of the two most famous on the menu, the aforementioned Slayer. With a name like Slayer, how can it not be good, right? Well, unfortunately, little did I know that the Slayer isn’t your traditional burger. Instead of coming on a bun, the patty is placed in a gigantic plate of fries topped with literally everything you could ever want. Just look at the photo—notice the mountain of fries, onions, chili, sausage, cheese, chives, and peppers? Needless to say, the plate was one of the biggest, most butt-kicking, most monstrous challenges I’ve ever faced.

Thus, my first thought on seeing it was, unsurprisingly, “What is this? Is it even a burger?” I thought I had misread all the reviews pinpointing the Slayer as the burger to get. To my surprise, though, I discovered after eating through half the plate that this actually is somewhat of a burger. Underlying the excellent pile of cheese fries is a ½ lb. patty somewhere. While I was astounded at the quality of this everything-but-the-kitchen sink dish, I was a bit disappointed that the burger part—the patty—was literally just tacked on needlessly to an otherwise extraordinary plate of fries.

I just couldn’t walk away from Kuma’s without a taste of an actual burger, and so I ordered up the house special, the Kuma Burger, a simple burger with fried egg, bacon, and cheddar.

You read that right—I ate a second 10 oz. burger! And afterwards, not only did I feel sick, I felt just a bit stupid, as the burger simply was not worth the trouble. The meat was again slightly clumpy, while the pretzel roll bun was overwhelmingly salty, though it did withstand the weight of the monstrous mountain of toppings very well.

Kuma’s, then, really was a letdown. I had come to escape from all niceties of the gourmet burger restaurants in town, only to realize that I was actually better off at those restaurants. Kuma’s was not only too touristy and too crowded, but the supposed best burgers of Illinois, while good, didn’t actually deliver, either in the meat quality or in the combination of toppings. Still, I might return someday if I’m ever in the mood for an extraordinary fry plate.

What I Tasted

1) Slayer (Pile of fries topped with a ½ lb. Burger, Chili, Cherry Peppers, Andouille, Onions, Jack Cheese, and Anger):

The first thing you’ll notice is the fresh red pepper, which is excellent. There are actually huge chunks of it tossed in there gratuitously, really burning your mouth in practically every bite, especially in the aftertaste. That helps to take your mind off all the overwhelming grease, oil, and starch. As for the fries, they’re very good. They’re served criss-cut and rather thin, so you get a perfectly crunchy top. But they’re fried on the lighter side, and the batter is a bit light, so they’re not as heavy as they might seem, which is especially nice because there’s just so many heavy ingredients. Next, the sausage is a bit oversalted, but it’s succulent and has a good smokiness. The chili is chock full of ground beef, adding another level of savoriness. As for the cheese, it’s distributed very generously, so you never run out, as you do with a lot of nacho-type dishes. Moreover, since it’s jack cheese it adds just another level of herby spice to this combo. Finally, the caramelized onions are also distributed throughout, so every bite has a little added sweetness. Overall, the flavors are all very bold. It is, however, rather hard to eat the whole thing. It really just ravaged me. But all in all, this is an amazing plate of cheese fries, with literally any topping you could almost ever want.

And as if that wasn’t all enough, you finally get to the meat patty center and realize it is a burger, not a plate of fries. I was just working through the burger, writing everything you’ve just read, when, after finishing my whole review, I realized, there’s a whole damn patty of meat stuck right there in the middle! So not only do you get an actual burger patty—and one that’s humungous—you have to fight through some of the best chili fries just to get to it. This really is the Slayer!

I will say, though, that I ironically found the chili fries section to be better than the patty. The patty was succulent, but mine had a bit too much mushiness in the middle. I asked for medium, but I got plenty of red in there, more like a medium rare, and the meat, while cooked well for the most part, had a bit of grittiness or mushiness that I just found slightly unsatisfactory. Nor was the patty seasoned very well, but in this case I can forgive that because the toppings are just so overstocked that they provide plenty of flavor to go with the patty. The larger concern is whether you can actually eat everything with that patty. I just can’t imagine sausage, chili, and fries all going on a patty with a good result. In that sense, it’s really just a gratuitious overload of flavors.

Still, these are some of the best chili fries I’ve had in a long time, just not the best burger. Oh, and no bread on the burger is simply unforgiveable! 3.0/5.0 as a burger. More of a 4.5 if you look at it as a plate of cheddar fries rather than a burger.

2) Kuma Burger (Fried Egg, Cheddar, Bacon)

Since the Slayer was a bit undercooked, I ordered this one medium-well, and it helped, as this time it was actually cooked all the way through and not quite as mushy. I noticed, though, that it’s in the nature of this type of meat to be kind of clumpy. By that I mean it has an unsatisfyingly gritty texture, especially since it’s so thick that it eventually just overtakes the mouth in a mushy, clumpy mash, which is only made worse by the fact that the meat is not really seasoned at all. It’s hard to even taste pepper, though the salt isn’t so subtle. In fact, there is way too much salt, especially because the bacon, though extremely fatty (with the oil just dripping off) is heavily salted, completely overpowering the taste of everything else even though it is used sparingly. The pretzel roll, too, amplifies the problem by adding more salt.

There are a few things this burger does right, though. The first is the fried egg, cooked sunny-side-up so that the yoke drips out almost as soon as you put on the top bun. That yoke softens the whole mix, especially adding some moisture to the meat so it’s not so dry and mushy in the mouth. Moreover, it moderates the salt. Second, the pretzel roll, while a bit salty, is a monster of a bun that really withstands the force of everything. Mine didn’t fall apart at all, which is nice when you have a patty that’s so large. Third, the cheese is smothered all over in a thick layer, meaning you get some cheese in every bite—and trust me, the meat really needs that cheesiness to compensate for its quality.

Overall, then, it’s not a bad burger, but there’s just too much that’s off in the patty and the seasoning to compensate for the good concept. 2.8/5.0

Scores

Ambience: 1.5/5.0
Service: 1.2/5.0
Taste: 3.0/5.0
Value: 4.0/5.0. A burger this big at this price isn’t too common.
Overall: 2.5/5.0